Being in a relationship is a big step and commitment. Good relationships are stable and leave you feeling content while also providing flexibility and support. Many people wonder whether they are in the best relationship for them and if they should continue to invest time and energy into their relationship.
Good relationships are an essential component to a happy and fulfilled life, so it makes sense that people want to prioritize relationships and make sure they are in the best situation possible for all involved. There are many signs of a health relationship.
Here are 7 ways to check the quality of yours:
- Healthy relationships are stable
Healthy relationships offer stability and are reliable and dependable. In a healthy relationship, you can depend on your partner to be there for you and to show up for you. In healthy relationships, partners can rely on one another and are relationships that do not change frequently or erratically but offer a sense of stability.
- Healthy relationships are supportive
In healthy relationships, partners are supportive of one another. If one partner has a desire to do something new, or to take a different approach, the other partner will be supportive and encouraging. A healthy relationship offers support by having someone to share our opportunities with. Unconditional support is one of the most important aspects of relationships, even when partner have differing opinions.
- Healthy relationships are real
Healthy relationships are those in which all people involved can be completely real and honest with one another. In a healthy and supportive relationship, each person can authentically share themselves and can bring their real issues to the table to be addressed. These relationships do not expect a partner to be perfect and recognize the importance of having someone who can stay present through the ups and downs of life.
- Healthy relationships are relaxing
In a healthy relationship people are able to relax. The relationship should be a space in which each person can unwind from the chaos of daily life and retreat to safety and stability. A good relationship will be a place where partners can relax and let go of their worries for a while.
- Healthy relationships involve compromise
Each person is a unique individual and even two people in relationship can be very different. It is important to recognize that couples and those in relationships will not always agree on everything but can still be dedicated to compromise. When one person overpowers another or is dominant and controlling, the relationship will suffer. Compromise and compassion allow a relationship to flourish even when there are differing opinions and ideas.
- Healthy relationships care for the self and the other
In healthy relationships, each person maintains autonomy and individuality. Each person is able to continue to live their own lives and can express their needs and desires. In a healthy relationship, many activities are done together while others are done separately in further development of the self.
Healthy relationships allow us to work together to achieve something greater than we could as individuals. They also allow a person to put themselves first so they can continue to offer companionship.
- Healthy relationships involve closeness
One of the joys of having a healthy relationship is the closeness that people feel with one another. Being in a relationship offers an opportunity to engage deeply with other people and to create vulnerability and sensitivity.
Closeness in relationship creates a fulfillment that can change our lives for the better. Being able to tell someone our deepest secrets helps us to feel accepted and worthy, and healthy partnerships foster this authenticity and emotional openness.
Any type of relationship can become toxic, whether it is with coworkers and colleagues, an intimate partner, or family and friends. Toxic relationships can deplete physical and emotional health and can even impact financial security.
Toxic relationships are those in which there are unhealthy standards as well as lack of trust, insecurity, manipulation, control, and other detrimental factors. A toxic relationship is one that breaks you down instead of building you up.
Toxic relationships can take on many forms, so it is most important to examine your own personal boundaries and requirements for relationship in order to determine if the relationship is beneficial for you or if you may be involved in a toxic situation that needs your attention and action.
Seven Signs of Toxicity:
- You do not trust your partner
Trust is the foundational element of a positive relationship. When there is a lack of trust within the relationship, then it is likely a toxic situation. In a mature relationship, both partners can be honest about their experiences and can work together to resolve issues.
In a toxic relationship it is necessary to hide things from your partner because they don’t trust you. Conversely, you may not trust your partner due to their past actions or secrecy. Lack of trust in a relationship is toxic and does not build meaning.
- You feel judged or disrespected
If a partner is constantly judging the decisions you make or disrespecting your opinions, you may be in a toxic relationship. Being with a partner who is judgmental can affect mental and emotional health and can cause you to question yourself. If your partner judges you then they are not being supportive and are not serving their primary purpose in relationship.
- Communication is lacking
When communication is lacking it may be a sign of a toxic relationship. Not all people communicate well, and some relationships innately require less communication than others to run smoothly. Yet, if you cannot communicate with your partner due to fear of their reaction, or if you are not allowed to share your opinions and have them heard, then you are in a toxic situation.
- You feel unsafe or uncomfortable and may be “walking on eggshells”
If you fear that something you say or do could “set off” your partner into rage, anger, or other insult, then you are in a toxic relationship. If you feel unsafe in any way you should immediately reach out for support and leave the situation as soon as possible. The idea of “walking on eggshells” around someone is not a healthy form of expression and is instead a suppression of your own needs and desires and ideas.
- You do not have autonomy or independence
If your partner tries to control you by not allowing you to make decisions for yourself, then you have likely lost your autonomy and independence. If you partner tells you what you are and are not allowed to do, you are in a toxic and controlling relationship. You should always be supported in your exploration of self-identity and able to come and go as you please.
- Your feelings are dismissed or criticized
If your partner is highly critical of you and always dismissing your ideas or putting you down, you are not in a healthy and equitable relationship. Your partner should value your feelings and should not criticize you or cut you down.
- You are unhappy
If you are not happy in your relationship, you may be in a toxic situation. Not all toxic relationships are obvious or contain abuse. Sometimes people are controlling or judgmental of others without ill-will or intention. But, if you are not whole-heartedly happy and fulfilled in the relationship, you may need to do work to ensure that you are in a positive and uplifting, engaging relationship.